by Star

To many people, love is an abstract word defining a subjective emotional feeling that anyone can experience. We use the word "love" in different ways for different purposes.

For instance, we believe that to be in love with someone is different from just loving someone. You have probably heard the following statement quite often: "I love you, but I am not in love with you." We usually categorize and classify love in a way that is hard to fully understand.

For example, we believe that to love our parents is different from loving our boyfriends or girlfriends. We even use the word "love" for loving our jobs, cars, shoes, and underwear. One more thing about this mysterious word "love" is that to make love has its own distinguishing meaning which does not need any explanation. But really, what is love? I think we are short of words to express our feelings in different ways for different reasons. Perhaps we should get together and invent new words for each category of love.

When you fall in love with somebody in your workplace, a nightclub or anywhere else, your brain experiences a new set of biochemical reactions. These biochemical reactions are triggered by the release of three different neurotransmitters in your brain: dopamine, noradrenalin and phenyl ethylamine. The simultaneous rush of these chemicals into specific parts of your brain makes you feel what is call "falling in love." Do not get offended or insulted by knowing how your brain functions. I don't think you get offended by knowing how your digestive system works. I don't think you refuse to eat meat because you already know how meat is digested in your digestive system. And I don't think you are going to get upset when you discover that love comes out of your brain not your heart.

I hope you don't look at love as being less worthy, just because it is only a set of biochemical reactions which may be reproducible experimentally. The "love neurotransmitters" are responsible for that initial, immediate attracting force when you feel crazy about someone. Nevertheless, after a dozen dates, more or less, you may start losing that special feeling for the person. The wonderful feeling of love may disappear only because the level of the neurotransmitters drops down. That is why in most cases we break up with our once beloved partners after a while.

Fortunately, some of us progress to the next step in our relationship and start developing new feelings, but feelings different from the initial love. This different love is a true love, which can last for a lifetime, thanks to another chemical called oxytocin or "cuddling hormone." This is the chemical that makes strong bonds between life partners or a mother and her baby. Knowledge of how love works does not mean love is not worth trying. As Shakespeare once put it, to fall in love and fail is better than not to fall in love at all.

by Star