Religions That Never Die

If you for a few moments suspend your faith and allow your brain to work unfettered by dogma and you consider the history of religions of mankind you will notice some interesting trends.

All peoples have had some form of religion. At the most basic these have been sets of superstitions, ancestor cults and animism; envisioning animals, trees, forest, the sea, the sky or whatever as forces with a will and an identity.

Religions die. Some religions die out totally and once they have been buried for a few generations there is no longer any protection given to them. Dead religions are myths and legends, obviously believed only by misguided and superstitious primitives, we know better. Pretty pyramids but what was all that about the Jackal-headed god, give me a break, while of course believing in an elephant headed god is perfectly sane, we must respect people's sincerely held religions. <snort>.

When religions die they are taken over by more powerful religions. The things that make religions more powerful are:

1] Weight of numbers. A conquering people marches into to your country and outnumbers you twenty to one you are inclined to believe them when they say god is on their side. And if you don't they may just kill you and say their god made them do it.

2] Material culture. When conquering people arrive with magical technology far in advance of yours it becomes a little difficult to persuade them to accept that your god is better than their god. Never in recorded history has an advanced nation taken up the religion of a more primitive culture it has subdued, coincidence?

3] Smarter religion. Religions evolve with time, they evolve to survive. The more they are challenged the stronger they become. A tribal religion in a conservative and isolated culture doesn't stand a chance when it bumps against a religion that has come through a few dozen wars, conquests, revolutions and centuries of scientific discovery.

It is important to note that people have no way of knowing truth or feeling it directly. Truth is irrelevant for the spread of religions. Any idea can feel true. Feeling true is a meaningless concept. You can be fairly confident that people have felt their own story and explanation of the universe is true throughout all eras and societies; obviously that cannot be because they all were true (unless you define true in a very strange way), a more plausible explanation is that the human mind has a large capacity for faith and belief, and truth is irrelevant to that. If you have a faith and a belief in some ultimate truth you know how strong that feeling can be, all I ask you to do is to ponder how many other people equally hold other "self evident truths" that cannot be true if yours is true and vice versa. Feeling truth is obviously of no value at all in convincing others, unless you can persuade them to accept your 'truth' over their own.

In addition some ideas are simply better suited to survival as religions than others because they have greater appeal and enhance the chances of spreading the religion or the vigour with which it is held.

Better, more contagious, ideas include:

1] Monotheism.

The KISS principle; Keep It Simple, Stupid.

It is much harder to convince people that there are multiple gods with different powers compared to the much simpler idea that there is only one god and his name is the registered trade mark of your church.

2] Survival after death.

Death is the great certainty, how much better if you could offer people a certainty beyond the certainty? Everlasting life or rebirth under better circumstances gives people a bribe of great value, and it costs nothing to write cheques against this account as nobody ever comes back to cash them. Pie in the sky. This is a better scam than selling land when the tide is out.

3] The Big Lie.

This is the classic. Only by believing in the doctrine of the church can people be good people. People who don't believe the stories are bad people, not to be trusted.

This may or may not be coupled with

4] The Big Stick.

Death and damnation to the unbelievers. Can you afford to take the chance? Think about it, all they ask is a tenth of everything you earn, one seventh of your life, constant devotion and perhaps a bequest on your death and in return they can ensure you don't get kebabed for all eternity, what a bargain!

5] It's in the Book.

A great big book written a long time ago and full of ambiguous phrases that sound a bit clumsy but probably read better in the original language, or perhaps they didn't. But either way all the truth is there in The Book. The book helps because it has ambiguous answers and one of its best features is the back cover, it is a closed book, nothing can be added, the last word of god has already been written so don't you dare add anything new. (Except prayers, hymns, services, dogmas, dress codes, revisions, deletions, catechisms, etc., etc.) The book always gives people a point to which they can retreat, regroup and advance again if one church or cult is foundering you can always strip away everything back to the book and rejuvenate your religion with the burning intensity of revival. Unfortunately every time you try to do such a thing you cause as many problems as you solve, but never mind, god made you do it, and you can prove it, quote the book at them if they doubt you, it is a big enough book you are sure to find a bit that sounds good.

6] This stuff works for everybody.

This point is where Judaism shows its lack of competitive edge when compared to Christianity and Islam. How can you convert people to believe in your god if your god is a tribal god? On this score Islam is a competitive religion, especially if you are a man.

7] Don't Worry, be Happy!

A great selling point for a religion is to show people who believe in it being happy, rich or ideally both. Nothing succeeds like success. Positive thinking does make people feel better. Optimism is a delusion and even the average state of the human psyche is more positive than the facts allow, but positive thinking, even mindless over-optimism, does make people happier and more successful. Very infuriating but true. Believe in the lie and be happier and richer. The graveyards of the world are full of happy dead people who knew nothing bad would ever happen to them, for most of their life they were largely right.

8] Live and be seen to believe.

Crosses, fish on your bumper, turbans, veils, beards and ringlets, stars, crescent moons, dreadlocks. Badges help show other people what you believe and keep you visible.

9] Taboos.

If you can't eat the same food as the infidel how can you share a meal with him? If you can't share a meal how long can you spend with him? Taboos on diet keep the faithful apart from contagion from the infidels. If you don't spend time with them you don't get to know them, which is handy when your god (through his holy spokesman) asks you to put their women and children to the sword.

As time goes on religions get better at defending themselves against attack. I believe that the major religions that we have now (Christianity, Islam, Judaism, Buddhism and Hinduism) will never die. They will continue as at least a sizeable minority view for as long as this species exists.

Sorry if that depresses you.

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